Wednesday, July 09, 2008

So different

I don't get it. I can't wrap my mind around the fact that this pregnancy is so different from the last. I need to get in the mindset that Deuce is NOT Holden. Don't want to be pulling out the "Why can't you be more like your brother" card now do I?

I am understanding of the typical things. I understand that I am older...5 years actually! I know that my body has already been stretched to accommodate the living space of one child and sliced open and therefore will never be the same. I know that I have been through this once and I thought I knew what to expect.

Nope.

What I had with Holden was extreme craving for spicy food. EXTREME. I ate chili and tacos almost every day. I never got heartburn. I never had that pregnancy "mask." I never had a backache. I was emotional but certainly was never this bad, right Nate?

This is what I have with Deuce. An extreme aversion to most food. Yogurt and fruit are the only continual staple in my life. Texture of food is really bothering me. Nothing sounds good. I will crave something (paneer makhani, for example) and eat it and the next day the thought of it sends me into convulsions. I have heartburn all the time. I have that pregnancy mask of sunspots. I am E-MO-TION-AL You name it and I am in tears over it; commercials, in-laws, books. It's especially bad when Nate eats the last of the turkey on the last bagel in the house. This incident required him, of his own free will, to go to numerous shops around the city to round up shaved turkey breast, poppyseed bagels and mustard (I don't even like mustard) but that day it was essential and lucky for him they were all in stock!

To top it off, I am major stressed about all of the baby items we already own boxed up and labeled in the States. I really don't want to have to buy all new things especially since anything imported is about triple the price, but I really dread the thought of the 20 hour flight home 6 months pregnant with Holden, but without Nate, to schlep it all back over here!

Ah! At least I have the perfectly behaved child (at least for a 4 year old) an agreeable and understanding husband, someone to do my laundry and scrub my toilets and great friends to keep me going.

On a brighter note. We played tennis again today. It has been a couple weeks and 5 chiropractor visits since I last played and if I was "ruined" again after playing today, Nate was going to cut me off. He didn't think that 1 lesson and paying for 5 chiro appointment was worth it. It wasn't the tennis that damaged me though. I just overextended something one day at home and rather than let it heal, I insisted on playing though the irritation. Stubborn runs in our family! We played doubles on the same team. We play better together than against eachother. Everyone leaves happy and besides you wouldn't want me in tears over tennis would you?

3 comments:

Julie said...

I get it. I'm on number 4 and I'm thinking to myself..."I thought I knew how to do this. Why am I so mean? Why am I crying like this? Since when do Swedish Fish sound like the food of the Gods? What on earth is happening in my butt? Why does it hurt SO BAD? Why is this pregnancy so different?"

Here's hoping things get a little smoother as the weeks go by. Love you.

Alysia Cook said...

Hang in there, sista. I am sorry that you feel so out of sorts and I can totally relate. Take care of yourself!!!!!

tmayofut said...

What about the brother-in-law / favorite uncle that is waiting for you back in Layton that is dying to see the two of you and will do whatever he can do to help?